“I feel closest to God when I suffer “ -Neem Karoli Baba
Looking back I think most of the things that were the most challenging in my life such as – Yoga Teacher training, finishing my college degrees, running away from destructive relationships, traveling India alone for months, deciding to get up on a Sunday morning and go to a sweat lodge and stand barefoot in the freezing snow waiting to get into the stifling heat- these things have built me up more than the things that were handed to me.
I was a thrill seeker when I was younger. I think I was just trying to feel something, to get beyond my pain, and to prove that I could to others.
Now i do these things to intentionally let go of fear, to expand my consciousness and to wake up more and more each day until I die.
It is all preparation for death in this lifetime. I want to die consciously. It may take a few hundred more lifetimes. And maybe I’m wrong. But this is the reason I try every day to be a better person and to make a difference in this world.